Humor Articles & News
Stop Needling Me!
Sometimes it's possible to accomplish something important by doing nothing at all. Well, actually, I did do something. I resisted. I think that counts. Here's my story. Many of my friends have been getting pierced and tattooed for years. It's huge. Every neighborhood has at least one bodypiercing/bodyart place. Seems like they outnumber taverns these days. Naturally, they want me in on it. "C'mon Mike," they say. "It's fun! It's addictive! What? Are you afraid ...
Management Coaching: The Heart Of Performance Management
The semantics of training and development do a great job of muddling the topic of human effectiveness on the job. What, precisely, are the differences and similarities among terms like "engagement" and "performance management" and "performance appraisal," and even "motivation"? At the Center for Management and Organization Effectiveness, we mostly leave these questions to others. We focus instead on a skill that drives any and all of the above - regardless of terminology. In fact, ...
Hollander Consultants Treasury Manager Flies To Louisiana To Help With Disaster Relief
Pat Tiller Volunteers to Assist Katrina Victims Portland, OR: Hollander Consultants' Treasury Manager, Pat Tiller flew to Louisiana today to help with Hurricane Katrina disaster relief. He will be in Louisiana for a minimum of two weeks. A resident of Sandy, Oregon, Tiller has been a member of the Mt. Hood Ski Patrol for the past 27 years and is certified in Mass Casualty Incident training. As a certified Emergency Response Coordinator, Tiller is experienced in setting up ...
How Important Is Your Office Chair?
How much do employers and employees truly value their office chair? I have been involved in office furniture installation for nearly 10 years and it constantly amazes me how a desk is valued far more than a chair. Both are inanimate objects, true; however a desk's purpose is simply too keep your computer, paperwork, photos of your family etc… off the floor. The value of the desk is 90% aesthetic. When I see clients with regard to office refurbishment, in 9 out of 10 cases they have a ...
Management Coaching To Improve Relationships With Work Associates
As an employee, you are a fairly new employee at your job. You have met the boss on two occasions; your interview and one time when he or she demanded that you finish a client's report. Your boss's unapproachable nature makes you feel uneasy if not a bit fearful. As the boss, you don't have a clue that your workers are intimidated by you. You are basically just concerned that they do their jobs well and produce profit for the company. Your impression of your co-workers is ...
Being Assertive
Many people find it extremely difficult to be assertive, whether it is in the work place, or in their personal lives. All too often, there is confusion between being assertive and being aggressive. It is my belief that you lose credibility and the moral high ground as soon as you show any signs of aggression. There are some very simple principles to being assertive. EXPECTATION Expect to be listened to, you'll be amazed at the difference there is when you are mentally ...
Premature Articulation
Ask anyone about what makes a good leader and they are sure to put the ability to communicate high on the list of necessary skills. Yet all to often communication is simply seen as the ability to speak. Listening - actively is an incredibly powerful tool at times rather neglected. I stated working with ***** who said, "I feel really frustrated. I often suggest ideas at meetings but others get the credit! I am really keen to get promotion and want to impress" ***** was keen to ...
Effective Listening
Effective communication is a vital tool for successful leadership. Being able to articulate clearly, to present and share ideas with others is extremely important. All too often listening becomes the poor relation everyone is busy talking but true communication does not take place unless each stake holder is listening actively too. Have you ever been in a room which is full of noise, everyone is contributing but no one really hears. All too often we are far more enthusiastic about ...
Chairing A Meeting The Most Effective Way
How many times have you attended a meeting where the only thing that gets decided is the date of the next meeting? Or where one person dominates the meeting? Or the meeting is swamped with trivia or unrelated information? It is a commonly held assumption that chairing a meeting is simply a matter of reading out the agenda - that is assuming there is an agenda and that the addenda actually covers the topics which are most pertinent to the matter in hand. Chairing an effective meeting ...
2 Pieces To The Puzzle Of Organizational Change
Kurt Lewin, the consummate applied social scientist, is responsible for giving us three of the ten concepts that support effective OC practice: Forcefield Analysis, The Three-Stage Model of Change, and the Action Research Model. I will cover the first two concepts in this article Lewin's first concept, and practice tool, is called Forcefield Analysis. Lewin believed every organizational situation, no matter how dysfunctional, benefits someone. I have found this concept and tool to be ...
Who Is To Blame? What Awaits New Orleans?london Is Not Falling Down
The London bombing was surely a big event that struck London. What could be behind all these bombings? Terrorist are all over and they are unstoppable. The waging war might have been a probable cause of these but this is no excuse especially to the victims of the deadly bombing. This terrorism has gone far enough and has caused a lot of deficiency with the families that are affected. British Prime Minister Tony Blair really condemns these attacks that assaulted London. He cannot ...
Uscis Reaches H-1b Cap
USCIS reaches H-1B cap Washington, D.C.- (August 12) U.S. Citizenship and Immigration Services (USCIS) announced today that it has received enough H-1B petitions to meet the congressionally mandated cap for fiscal year 2006. USCIS has determined that the "final receipt date" is August 10, 2005. Any petitions received on that date will be subject to the random selection process described below. USCIS will reject any petitions that are subject to the FY 2006 annual cap and received after ...
Sept. 1 2005 Will Bring New Traffic Laws To Tx
A number of notable Texas traffic and driving laws meant to grow safety on the roads and drivers education cognisance go into effect on September 1. Motor vehicle operators under the age of Automobile operators will now have a harder time getting traffic violations elminated from their 25. SB 1005 provides that if a driver younger than automobile operators years of age commits a traffic offense classified as a moving ...
Whistleblower Laws - Qui Tam
Whistleblower Laws - Qui Tam Qui tam is law terminology associated with whistleblower protection laws for individuals who inform the government about fraud or other corporation misdoings. The phrase is derived from the Latin expression 'qui tam pro domino rege quam pro seipse', which translates to 'he who sues for the king as for himself'. In general a Qui tam lawsuit is filed by private individuals on behalf of the government in an attempt to prevent abuse of funding and ...
Personal Injury Claim - Win Without A Doubt!
Everyone likes winning! If you win by an inch or a mile, winning is winning! Now winning at personal injury is a different ball game altogether. Do you want to claim compensation in direct result of an accident or injury? Okay, that's fine go ahead, you deserve it! Life Before A Personal Injury Claim I bet it was awesome... You were having the time of your life. Winning at everything, football, cricket, racing, baseball and even at work. Met targets, been promoted ...
Everyone Should Have A Living Will
According to information provided by http://www.plan-my-estate.com an an estate planning and asset protection resource web site, a living will, known in most states as a Directive to Physicians or Healthcare Directive, sets out your wishes about what extended medical treatment should be withheld or provided if you become unable to communicate those wishes. The directive creates a ...
Osteonecrosis Of The Jaw. Zometa,aredia,fosamax Linked To Jaw Bone Loss
Osteonecrosis of the Jaw. Zometa,Aredia,and Fosamax are common drugs that have been linked to the loss of jaw bone These drugs are a type of drug known as bisphosphonates. Recently a link has been found between bisphosphonates and a serious bone disease called osteonecrosis of the jaw (ONJ). This important discovery clearly shows that Fosamax and Zometa side effects may include osteonecrosis of the jaw, also known as "Dead ...
Selecting A Divorce Attorney
Selecting a divorce attorney is a critical decision making process. The person who you hire will be responsible for obtaining or maintaining your custody rights to your children, your property interests, and depending upon the side you are one, either minimizing or maximizing your support rights. In reality, selecting a divorce attorney is also an incredibly stressful experience. Do it right and you can breath easy. Do it wrong and you will spend years making up for losses that might have been ...
Accident Injury Claim - Get The Right Solicitor To Succeed
An accident injury can happen almost anywhere: at home, at work, on the road, shopping, during sport activities and so on. Each of these situations may bring many troubles, particularly if the injury is severe enough to affect your personal lifestyle or your ability to work for a longer time. However, with an accident injury claim it helps to compensate losses caused by the accident injury. It isn't always 100% recoverable such an annual holidays with friends and family. This ...
To Pee Or Not To Pee...
I should've known it. I just should've known it. One day last week I was drinking some coffee and looking over the morning paper. It's the typical workday morning ritual for me, just as I'm sure it is for a lot of ya'll out there. Most times, I can get through the paper in about five or ten minutes. This time, because the paper had a couple of good, lengthy articles in it, I decided to drink a second cup of coffee. No big deal, I thought. You see, it takes me ...
Humorous Software? It's Going To Bust Your Chops.
Do you think software is boring? Think again. Software companies have developed products that change your voice, make funny pictures and even predict your future. Curious? Read on. AV Voice Changer (Avnex Ltd) Browbeaten by bad chaps? Not allowed to play adult games? Want nobody to recognize your real identity? Now with AV Voice Changer Software, you not only can escape others' threats but also do "haunt" them the other way round. Like a "ghost", you can roam freely in voice ...
Mother's Trying To Find Time To Pamper!! Not
TIME FOR A PAMPER As a parent, many of you will be aware of how little time we have to really take time out of the normal slog of life and pamper ourselves. Much of the time is spent ferrying our children to various activities. Energy is used hollering and shouting at them to do their homework, tidy their room, stop the fighting, turn down the music. Just sorting out the tidying of bedrooms normally uses a serious amount of energy, what with all that threatening and hollering and waving ...
Bovine Resort
Meat is murder - I understand that - but what if it weren't murder? Would it be alright to eat it, then? The reason I was thinking of this was that I almost hit a couple of wild turkeys while driving to work today and it occurred to me that if I had hit them it wouldn't be murder at all and their meat would be free of the stigma of cruelty that taints most meat. And I should be able to eat themwith a clear conscience. (In Wisconsin if you hit wild animals you are allowed to keep the ...
Tonto's Lament
I approached the cell where they were holding Tonto. I had some feeling of fear at the prospect of being locked up in a 6x8 cell with the man who shot the Lone Ranger. The guard asked me if I wanted to go in and I mentioned this. " He also scalped him. Allegedly, that is". I went on in and stood there observing the man who shot America's greatest hero. He didn't look all that mean or dangerous. "Tonto? Can I ask you a few questions!" ...
How Time Flies When I Am In A Hurry
Have you ever noticed that when you are on vacation time goes by rapidly? According to my calculations (and I'm the first to admit I didn't do well in calculus), the average minute during vacation time is less than 20 seconds. This is one reason time goes by so quickly on vacation. The other reason, as everyone knows, is that during a vacation week there are no days beginning with the letter "T." Now, you know why your vacation went by so quickly this summer. There are always ...
Thick Mick's Curriculum Vitae.
When I was born, I nearly died! The vet said that I was too thick for the average pelvis, whatever that is. My schoolteacher (bless her), always said that if I had two brains, I’d be twice as thick. Not half as smart! Anyway, I think of it as a compliment. Granted, my head is a bit on the big side and the thickness of my skull is about an inch, but it never had an adverse effect on my ability to study the social habits of puppies and indigenous hedgehogs. My hands are also a little on ...
Inner Peace
By following the simple advice heard on The Dr. Phil show, I have finally found inner peace. Dr.Phil proclaimed the way to achieve inner peace is to finish all the things that you have started. So I looked around my house to see things I started and hadn't finished; and, before leaving the house this morning I finished off a bottle of Merlot, a bottle of White Zinfandel, a Bottle of Bailey's, a bottle of Kahlua, a package of Oreos, the remainder of both Prozac and Valium prescriptions, ...
Cheer-leadership Or all I Need To Know About Business I Learned From Cheerleading
Thanks to teen movies, many people have this stereotypical idea of cheerleaders as being ditzy and mean. However, there are a great many life-lessons that can be learned during your time on the team that have surprising application in the business world.
It's September Silly!
Copyright The Quipping Queen 2005. IT'S SEPTEMBER SILLY! Or, 30 thrilling things to do this month! Compiled by Lady Beatrice Blitterlees and edited by Lord Earl Craboon September is the 9th month of the year. No one has a clue why they call it “Sept”ember meaning “seventh” in French, instead of “Neuf” meaning “ninth”. Obviously “The Association for the Correct Name of Things” hasn’t got around to fixing ...
Female, Horny, Middle Aged And Behaving Badly
Female, Horny, Middle Aged and Behaving Badly As a woman – I am often surprised to find that many of us do not seem to be in touch with our sensuality or sexuality. Or maybe its because we are not willing to admit to having such feelings – no wonder we’re sometimes called all manner of names. But I digress… I’m not saying that you should hit the town every night with a sign slung around your neck saying “I’m available.” One still has to have an element of decorum and dignity ...